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honey512
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Group: Members Joined: 08th Sep, 2010 Topic: 2 Post: 8 Age:
28
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| Posted on:8th Sep 2010, 11:07pm |
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 Love Or Arrange Marriage: Which One Is Better
Hi,
Main ya maloom karna chata hon k Love Marriage theak hoti hai ya k Arrange? Mery khayal se dono hi theak hoti han but depend karta hai miaan bevi dono ki families pe, halat pe, or apas ki understanding pe!
me sirf apni cousin ko like karta hon, or wo bhi mujhe bohat like karti hai, hum dono ki apas me achi understanding hai or ek dosry k mizaj ko khoob samajhty han, in simple ek dosry se bat kiye baghir dono ko chain ni ata jab tak bat na ho jye preshan rehty han.
ab masla ye ha k mery parents meri wahan shadi se agree nahi jab k us k parents agree han. or me is waqt bohat uljhan me hon k kya karon? q.k na to agy ja sakta hon or na hi wapis aa sakta hon!
agr humari shadi na hovi to hum dono kya kabhi ksi or k sat khush raehn gy (means after arrange marriage)?
Please guide me by your experience / suggestions
Awaiting for...
Thanks
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H/dr_Qasim
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Group: Members Joined: 10th Sep, 2010 Topic: 185 Post: 6560 Age:
36
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| Posted on:9th Sep 2010, 2:13am |
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love and arrange marriage Lover or wife meah zumeen asmaan ka furq hota hay, peyar bina ameeri ghureebi , onch neech, rung nussul, qom qubeela , nationaity, ho jata hay, ap kisi ko like kurny lugh jaty hen woh apky Ikhtiyaar meah nahi hota lakin ap nikah ka pagham , apny parants ko btaa kay bhej sukty hen chay ap lurka hen ya lurki, or essy arrange marriage buna sukty hen,
love marriage bina dakhy sony , kay ameer k ghureeb , job wala k jobless, kala ya gora, yani bus osy koi fikur nahi hoti or woh juzbaat ki ro meah aa ky sub soch or kur ra hota hay essy jessy rat ka ghur bunaa raha ho , or rat ka ghur kisi bhe wakat toot sukta hay
jub kay arrange marrage hur bat ki purrukh soch sumaj kay jan pachaan kur kay , hur bat ko discuss kur kay achi tura dakh bhaal kay kee jati hay, or eski kamyaabi kay chances 90% hoty hen, lakin arrange marraige meah apki pussund shamil hona bot zurori hay, agur apki pussund shamil nahi tu chances 50 50, Islam meah Murd or orut dono ki bahami ruzamandi zurori hay, so jub lurka lurki apni bahum ruzamundi say dono families ko sath lay kay shadi kurty hen woh bundhaan muzbot hota hay
Jub ap koi tree ya plant apny ghur Oganaa chaty hen ya lugana chahuty hen tu ap Garden say achi Quality ka healhty or khobsoorat plant yaa achi quality or ziyada phul dany wala seed ya tree or plant lay kay aty hen , essi tura jub bat husband or wife ki aati hay tu pher ek acha rishta hur tura say dakh bhal kay jub keya jata hay or os meah dono ki ruzamundi or khoshi shamil hoti hay tu wo shadi 100% kamyaab ho sukti hay,
Love marriage meah bot sari bato ko nuzur andaaz kur deya jata hay juzbaat meah aa kay jo bahd meah problem creat kurty hen , ku kay apka lover shadi kay bahd lover nahi husband ya wife kay rishty meah budal jata hay or woh apny onhe huqooq ka tuqaza kurta hay jo os rishty nay osy Shuri or qanooni tor pay deyeh howy hen, |
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Maryam
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Group: Members Joined: 17th May, 2008 Topic: 27 Post: 4679 Age:
30
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| Posted on:9th Sep 2010, 4:29am |
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 Arrange Marriage
Arrange Marriage
Arrange marriage maiN parents aur family mil kar decide kartay haiN . woh hum se zyada behtar jantay haiN duniya ko apnay tajarbay ki aankh se dekhtay haiN aur jazbaat se haT kar koi faisla kartay haiN + un ki baat man,nay par aulad k liye dheroN dher duaen us shadi maiN shamil hoti haiN isliye arrange marriage , luv marriage ki nisbat zyada kamiyab hoti hae kamiyab na bhi ho to kam az kam qaim zaroor rehti hae ta umar.
Parents can solve the problems
arrange marriage maiN agar miaN bivi k darmiyan koi jhagRa hota hae to un k parents usay solve karnay ki koshish kartay haiN . jo bhi ghalti par ho usay pressurize bhi kartay haiN k woh apna attitude badlay . aik baat aur bhi dekhnay main ayi hae k jo larki maaN baap khud pasand kar k latay haiN woh usay protocol bhi zyada detay haiN .
Luv after Marriage
arrange marriage maiN amooman laRka, laRki aik doosre ko pehlay se nahi jantay . woh shadi k baad aik doosre ko jan,nay aur samajhnay ki koshish kartay haiN . aik doosre ki pasand na pasand ka khayal rakhtay haiN . bohat se muamlat maiN compromise kartay haiN aur sab se baRi baat k woh Nikkah main aik doosre ko har khoobi aur khami samait qabool kartay haiN . aur aik doosre k mutabiq khud ko mold karnay ki bhi koshish kartay hain .islam maiN bhi luv marriage ka nahi balkay luv after marriage ka concept hae.
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Maryam
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Group: Members Joined: 17th May, 2008 Topic: 27 Post: 4679 Age:
30
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| Posted on:9th Sep 2010, 4:53am |
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Luv Marriage
Luv Marriage
Luv marriage maiN laRka, larki aik doosre ko pehlay se jantay haiN aur amooman yeh first sight luv wala muamla hota hae . is maiN agar parents razi hojayeN to bohat hi achi baat hae har tarah se tassali k baad luv marrriage ko arrange kiya jaye to khushiyoN main izafa hojata hae warna parents ka dil dukha kar luv marriage karna koi aqalmandi nahi kyuN. k aap kisi k liye apnay parents k luv ko thukra rahay hotay haiN .
Dispute ratio is high in luv marriages
shadi se pehlay insaan apnay mehboob ko panay k liye har jatan karta hae. us ki har khuahish poori karna chahta hae. usay duniya ki har shaii se zyada qeemti samajhta hae aur us k liye sab kuch quraban karnay pe bhi tayar hota hae lekin shadi k baad jab zimadari sar pe ati hae to woh sirf luv ko time nahi de sakta . bivi ko mehbooba ki tarah rehnay ki adat hoti hae aur expectations bhi high hoti haiN isliye un main bohat jald jahgRa hota hae aik doosre ko shadi se pehlay k waday, qasmaiN yaad dilaye jatay haiN . amooman in jhagRoN main parents koi role ada nahi kartay, baqol un k k khud pasand kar k laye thay khud hi bhugto.
Difference before marriage & after marriage.
shadi se pehlay luv maiN fantasy zyada hoti hae aur jazbat bhi . aap har baat ko dil ki nigah se dekhtay haiN jab k shadi k baad demagh zyada chalnay lag jata hae . jab tak miaN bivi aik doosre ka libaas ban kar aik nahi hotay tab tak woh aik doosre pe mukamal open nahi hotay isliye understanding before marriage ka concept hi ghalat hae . shadi k baad aik doosre ki khamiyan bardasht karna mushkil hojata hae .
jo log aik doosre se bohat mohabbat kartay haiN aur kisi wajah se shadi nahi ho pati to woh dil bardashta na hoN k aisi surat main kam az kam mohabbat ka bharam qaim reh jata hae .
Islamically shadi se pehlay apnay dil ko kisi ki yaad aur mohabbat se abaad karna thek nahi .
Jo insaan kisi ghair mehram ko Mohabbat ki nigaah se dekhta hae Allah pak us se apni mohabbat ki nazar pher leta hae.
insaan ko sab kuch mil jaye Allah hi na milay to kiya mila. isi tarah agar sab kuch kho kar bhi Allah mil jaye to sab kuch mil jata hae. baat sachi lagan aur khuloos ki hoti hae.
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Maryam
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Group: Members Joined: 17th May, 2008 Topic: 27 Post: 4679 Age:
30
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| Posted on:9th Sep 2010, 5:02am |
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honey 512 bhai agar aap k parents k ilawa sab razi haiN to i think aap apnay parents ko mana saktay haiN . laRkoN k liye to parents ko manana zyada asaan hae ba.nisbat kisi laRki k . aap unhaiN apnay jazbat se agaah karaiN aur unhaiN batayen k un ki marzi aur khushi aap k liye kitni ehmiyat rakhti hae . aur yeh bhi k aap kisi aur k sath is tarah khush nahi reh payengay. Allah pak se dua karaiN aur apna muamla Allah pe choR daiN . is k sath apni effort bhi kartay rahaiN . jab bhi parents se apnay mutaliq baat karni ho to 3 martba Surah e ikhlas paRh kar apnay maqsad k liye baat karaiN umeed hae k aap k parents bhi razi hojayengay. (inshAllah)
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s4u
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Group: Members Joined: 18th Mar, 2011 Topic: 99 Post: 5405 Age:
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| Posted on:9th Sep 2010, 7:02am |
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 aey kash.......
"Jo insaan kisi ghair mehram ko Mohabbat ki nigaah se dekhta hae Allah pak us se apni mohabbat ki nazar pher leta hae."
kash k sab log ye bat samjh pate.main jab ye bat kisi ko samjhane ki koshish krti to ulta jawab ye milta k aap hum se jalti h...haqeeqat me wo nadan log th.
aap agar is ka reference de sakti h to dijiye.agar ye kisi hadeess me se h.
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saahilbhai
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Group: Members Joined: 31st Oct, 2007 Topic: 17 Post: 971 Age:
29
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| Posted on:9th Sep 2010, 7:14am |
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Maryam baji Excellent , i totally agree with you, agar sare larke aur larkian yeh baat samajah jayen tou jo unke uper pyaar mohabbat ka bhoot sawar hai na woh kiss had tak kam ho jaye, |
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Battery
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Group: Members Joined: 17th Jul, 2010 Topic: 8 Post: 144 Age:
20
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| Posted on:9th Sep 2010, 11:55pm |
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maryam lkn love to khud hi baghair bataye ho jata hai to phr KHUDA q nazar pher leta hai?agr ksi ko luv ho jaye to is mein us ki kia ghalti hai
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honey512
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Group: Members Joined: 08th Sep, 2010 Topic: 2 Post: 8 Age:
28
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| Posted on:9th Sep 2010, 1:50pm |
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If Love marriage becomes arrange marriage then? I am very thank full for all your comments & suggestions.
Dear Maryem,
Mujhe apki ye ghair moharam wali bat samajh me nahi aye? Plz explain in my case?
Also one thing more, agar marriage ko arrange kar liya jye to?
Wesy bhi islam me ye bat to hai na k shadi me Mard or Aurat dono ki pasand shamil hona zaroori hai!
or baki rehy gay shadi k bad k events maslan larai jhagray etc to wo to kon si aisi family hai jahan pe nahi hoty han?
bat sirf itni si hai k un ko log handly kis tarah se karty han?
Plz is bary me bhi zara soch k bataen?
Awaiting for all your comments / suggestions.
Thanks and Happy Eid Mubarak to all in Advance. |
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smartfaizy
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Group: Members Joined: 22nd Aug, 2010 Topic: 0 Post: 73 Age:
26
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| Posted on:9th Sep 2010, 7:21pm |
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salam bhai hamein to love marrige karni thi karli me to bohat khushh ho
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Emeraldine
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Group: Members Joined: 05th Sep, 2010 Topic: 5 Post: 27 Age:
30
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| Posted on:10th Sep 2010, 3:15am |
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answer
About love marriage and arrange marriage, both have positive and negative views, you cant judge by the name of arrange and love, it depends on person to person natures, if anyone person is not good nature wise and have some bad characteristics than successful marriage will also come to an end surely either it has arranged or love or any mid way.
About love marriage if couple would not make it successful than i think iska reason ek azaab hai un people k liyai jo love ko badnaam kar kay love marriage karte hai,they don't know wo love nahi kar rahay just time wasting kar rahay hai aur gunah bhi shadi se pehle,or shadi kay baad is baat ka pata lag jata hai kay wo kitne pani main thay yani love ki hakekat, agar wo suchay honge love mai to kamiyab rahainge agar just flirt-attraction-lust and vice versa horaha hoga to phir shadi toot jaegi or dono ko ek dosre buray lagnay lagain ge or phir koi or acha lagne lag jata hai and that's the reason love marriage nakaam hojati hai but only true lovers successful rehte hai love marriage mai.
On the other hand arrange marriage is also not good, 2 people don't know about each other or unko shadi mai baandh dia jata hai baghair unki pasand ko anay,after marriage pata lagta hai k dono k mizaaj kitne milte hain,mizaj na milay to arrange marriage bhi kaam ki nahi, phir sacrifice se hi marriage chal sakti hai warna zindagi azaab sey kam nahe, but if they would adjust succesfully then they will also be successfull
In my thinking there is a middle way also which looks better than arrange and love, dono larka larki k ghar walay rishte ki baat karain pehle then dono ko kuch short time dein ek dosre k sath rehnay ka apne samnay for the purpose of knowing and aware from each other,if they think they are made for each other and will be happy in future then inki shadi kardi jae.if they think kay ye mere mutabik nahi hai and hamari adatain match nahe kartin to us hi wakt baat khatam kardi jae is tarha na shadi ki jhanjat and money zaya hogi na talak ka nuksan and gunah, it involves both parties parents and both persons equally. this middle way is the more smart and better version than arrange and love marriage.
we cant say this it will also be successful but you can say that kay ismai humnay couple ko moka bhi dia aur parents ko bhi moka dia.na parents ko aetraaz hoa na couple ko .result agar bad ayega shadi k baad to koi ye nahe keh sakay ga kay mistake parents ki thi ya mistake couple ki thi,,but i think it will decrease the chances of unsuccessful marriages. hows that ?
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Maryam
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Group: Members Joined: 17th May, 2008 Topic: 27 Post: 4679 Age:
30
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| Posted on:10th Sep 2010, 9:46am |
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Re: i,ll reply u later abhi family k sath eid mana loN :)
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myrizvi
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Group: Members Joined: 20th Apr, 2008 Topic: 130 Post: 7739 Age:
55
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| Posted on:11th Sep 2010, 5:52am |
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love n arranged marriage ka faraq :) jiss society main luv marriage common hojaa.ay... aisee society maiN... luv n arranged marriage ka faraq yeh rah jata hai :)
Love marriage main ap apni girl friend say marriage kartay hain aur arranged marriage main kissi doosray ki girl friend say .... :) |
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M Asif
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Group: Members Joined: 31st Oct, 2008 Topic: 4 Post: 794 Age:
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| Posted on:11th Sep 2010, 9:25am |
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Asalaam.0.Alaikum Waisay To Tafseel Say Bata Diya Giya Hai Love Aur Arrange K Baray, Mein Aap Sub Say Bahtar To Nahin Jaanta But Jaisi Meri Soch Hai Uskay Mutabik Kuch Share Karna Chahta Hon,
Hamaray Khaandaan Mein Arrange Marraige Below 50 Percent Kamyaab Hui Hain, Arrange Marraige Mein Yeh Hai K Aap Maa Baap Ki Marzi Say Shaadi Ker To Letay Hain Par Shaadi K Kuch Arsay Baad Jab Dono Ki Thinking Nahin Milti Na Lardki Ko Pata Hota Hai Lardkay K Baray Mein Aur Na He Lardkay Ko Lardki Ka Background Pata Hota Hai, Mumkin Hain Dono Mein Say Aik Before Marraige Kisi Aur Ko Pasand Karta/Karti Ho, Yeh Dono Ki Aadatein Bilkul He Mukhtalif Hon, Aur Kuch Logon Nay To Sacrifice Word Suna Huwa Hai Kabhi Uska Matlub Jan'nay Ki Koshish He Nahin Ki, Ek Ghalat Ho To Dosray Ka Kya Kasoor? Aur Kuch Logon To Moka Chaye Hota Hai K Yeh Koi Ek Ghalti Karay Aur Mein Usay Highlight Karon Maa Baap Ko Bataon K Apnay Karwaye Thi Ab Sambhalo Etc, Maa Baap Ki Khushi K Liye Arrange Marraige K Liye Razi Ho To Jatay Hain Baad Mein Jab Dono Ek Doosray Ko Nahin Samajh Patay To Lardaye Jhagday Choti Choti Baatein Bardhti Bardhti Nobat Talaak ALLAH Muaaf Karay Tak Aajati Hai Aur 2 Zindagiyan Tabah Ho Jati Hain.. Yeh B EK Possibility Hai Aisa Her Kisi K Saath Ho Zaruri Nahin Hai.
Ab Ayen Love Marraige Ki Taraf To Logon Nay Hawas Ko Love Ka Naam Diya Huwa Hai, Pyar Pakeeza Hona Chaye Hai, Ek Bacha Paida Hota Hai, Maa 9 Mah Takleef Uthaati Hai Jab Woh Duniya Mein Aata Hai To Maa Ko Itni Khushi Mehsoos Hoti Hai K Woh Saari Takleef He Bhool Jati Hai Jaisay Jaisay Woh Barda Hota Hai Maa Ko Pyara Lagta Hai Woh Do Saal Ka Hota Hai Maa Ko Aur Pyara Lagta Hai 20 Saal Ka Hota Hai Maa Ko Utna He Pyara Hota Hai, 50 Saal Ka B Beta Hojaye Maa Agar Hayaat Hai To Usay Utna He Pyaara Lagta Hai Jitna K Woh Paydaish K Waqt Pyara Lagta Tha, Yeh Pakeezgi Hai Sucha Pyaar Hai Kitna Anmol Rishta Hai Maa Baap Say Betay Beti Ka Bahen Ka Bhai Say Laiken Bv Say Aisi Muhabbat Kiun Nahin Rakhi Ja Sakti After Marraige Life Jo B Hai Miyan Bv K Darmiyaan Usay Itna Kiun Involve Kar Liya Jaata Pyaar Ko Kiun Us Hud Tak Rakha Jata Hai Woh Cheez Apni Jaga Usay Pyaar Nahin Kehtay? Us Cheez Ko Ek Side Par Rakhein, Pyaar Kaisay Kum Hoga Maa Say Beta Jitna Jhagar Lay Do Din Doori Bardaasht Nahin Kar Payega, Apni Buniyaad Mazboot Rakho Koi Milawat Nahin Honi Chaye Hai To Imaraat 100 Saal Tak Nahin Hilaygi, Hamara Pyar Yeh Hai Bazaar Gaye Kapray Dekhay Ek Bohat Pasand Aaagia Shok Say Silwaya Pehna Start Mein Bohat Pyara Laga 1 Saal Tak Achaa Lagta Raha Phir Ek Din Konay Mein Daba K Rakh Diya..
INSAANO AUR CHEEZON MEIN FARK HE NAHIN HAI..
Love And Arrange Ko Choro Shaadi Ko Dekho Jis'say Mutmaeen Ho Woh Kero Yeh Aap Par Depend Karta Hai K Love Kaisa Kartay Ho Aur Arrange Par Kitna Believe Hai Kitni Himat Rakhtay Ho K Jaisi B Bv Mili Us Say Shadi K Baad Itna Chahonga K Woh Gila Kar He Na Payegi Mein Moka Donga To Jhagdaygi, But Soch Samajh Kar Decision Lein Yeh Sirf Aapki Life Nahin 2 Zindagion Ka Sawaal Hai...
Agar Koi Point Achay Lagay To Theek Warna Ignore Kerdijiyega Post..
ALLAH HAFIZ.. |
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000amna
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Group: Members Joined: 09th Sep, 2009 Topic: 42 Post: 252 Age:
25
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| Posted on:11th Sep 2010, 12:20pm |
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love ya arrange???
hi frds h r u?nitopic meri shaidi kch is tarha hui k phaile engagement pir hm dono ma love hogia bht zada ek dusre se pyar karne lag gay.pir shadi hogai.so kia yeh love hai ya arrange?kia asi shadi kambiyab hoti hain?
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Maryam
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Group: Members Joined: 17th May, 2008 Topic: 27 Post: 4679 Age:
30
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| Posted on:11th Sep 2010, 5:09pm |
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s4u & bettery s4u. maiN aap ko is hadees ka hawala to nahi bata sakti yeh darsequran.com main peer zulfiqar naqshbandi sahib ne apnay bayan " gherat e Khudawandi ka moama " maiN bataya hae aap wahan se sun sakti haiN .
Bettery ji. Mohabbat insaan k ikhtayar main nahi hoti lekin uski nazar aur us k khayalat to us k ikhtayar main hotay hain na ? Allah pak ne mohabbat se mana nahi farmaya balkay insaan k khameer main hi Mohabbat ko shamil kiya gaya hae lekin woh mohabbat yeh nahi jo hum kehtay haiN .
Jo Mohabbat Allah pak ne rishtoN maiN rakhi hae us mohabbat k badlay ajr o sawab bhi rakha hae .
kisi bhi gair mehram ya unknown person se luv start kahan se hota hae ya buniyadi wajah kiya banti hae ?
1- aap kisi ko dekhtay haiN aur baar baar dekhtay haiN ya dekhnay ki khuahish kartay haiN .
2- koi 1st sight main aap ko itna acha lagta hae k aap us k baray maiN har lehza sochtay haiN aur us ki yaad se khushi mehsoos kartay haiN .
3- kisi k sath time spend karnay se achi achi bataiN karnay se insaan kisi k itna close hojata hae ya khud ko feel karta hae k us k liye soft corner feel karta hae.
bazahir yeh sab bataiN choTi choTi si haiN lekin islam main mana haiN . to jis cheez ki base hi mamnoo hae woh majmooi tor par jaiz kaise hosakti hae ?
albatta agar koi pasand ata hae ya us k liye mohabbat k jazbat ubhartay hain to behtar hae k us k baray main parents se baat ki jaye aur shadi k baad apni mohabbat ka khul kar izhaar kiya jaye.
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Maryam
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Group: Members Joined: 17th May, 2008 Topic: 27 Post: 4679 Age:
30
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| Posted on:11th Sep 2010, 5:19pm |
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If Love marriage becomes arrange marriage then? Nabi Pak (Salalaho Alehay Wasalam )ki aik hadees hae k mohabbat k liye behtareen tohfa nikkah hae .
jis se mohabbat ho us se shadi bhi karni chahiye takay sari zindagi k liye mohabbat ko qaim rakha jaye.
jahan tak ghair mehram pe mohabbat ki nazar ki baat hae to kabhi hum se related rishtay bhi yeh gawara nahi kartay k un ki mohabbat main koi hissa dar banay. bivi kabhi apnay shohar ko ijazat nahi de sakti k woh us k ilawa kisi aur ki mohabbat dil main basaye ya kisi aur ka khayal apnay dil maiN laye & vice versa.
to Allah pak jo humara khaliq hae malik hae kiya Us ki gherat yeh gawara kar sakti hae k banda Allah ka ho aur dil maiN mohabbat kisi ghair ki .
i hope its clear now. agar nahi to aap mazeed sawal karsaktay haiN .
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sunehri76
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Group: Members Joined: 04th Aug, 2007 Topic: 100 Post: 4647 Age:
38
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| Posted on:11th Sep 2010, 9:55pm |
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agreed to Maryam´s points about love & arrange marriage..
"Jo insaan kisi ghair mehram ko Mohabbat ki nigaah se dekhta hae Allah pak us se apni mohabbat ki nazar pher leta hae."
ye bat defination pe depend karti hai ..kaun iski kya defination karta hai.. Agar Islam me ek ladki ladke ka ek dusre ko Pasand karna ya ek dusre ke lye Muhabbat ka Jazba rakhna Gunnah samajhta .ya is se Allah us se Nazar pher leta ...to kya humare pyare nabi ye farmate,ke Muhabbat ka behtareen tohfa Nikah hai?? agar aisa hota to Islam me ek dusre kelye Rishte se pehle Razamandi lazmi na hoti..
ye bat un logon ke lye ki ja sakti hai.jo Insaan ki Muhabbat me Allah ki zaat ko bhool jate hain.Allah talah aise logon se nazar pher sakta hai..
Kayi Mard aise hain jo Shadi dhuda hote hue,kisi aur ko Pasand kar lete hain aur phir bad me us ladki se second shadi karte hain... kya Allah aise kisi se Nazar pher sakta hai ?? Nahi ..Allah Talah bohat hi reham karne wala hai..
kayi shadi shuda females ko bhi shadi ke bad kisi se pyar ho jata hai..aur wo apne shohar se alehdagi ikhteyar kar ke apni pasand ke admi se shadi bhi kar leti hain...Allah Talah aise me us se Nazar nahi pherega..
kyoonke Islam me ek aurat ko bhi ye haq diya hai ke jab wo apne shohar ke sath khush na ho,to us se Khula le kar alehdagi ikhteyar kar sakti hai..
Lehaza mai is bat ko nahi man sakti ,ke Allah Talah kissi se is lye nazar pher le kyoonke usse koi Pasand a gaya hai...ye un logon ke lye ho sakta hai ,jo Allah ko bhool jate hain..Allah aise kissi se itna sakht naraaz nahi ho sakta !! |
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Emeraldine
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Group: Members Joined: 05th Sep, 2010 Topic: 5 Post: 27 Age:
30
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| Posted on:12th Sep 2010, 1:36am |
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answer i accept this mehram na mehram statement given by most of the members, but please think about it that most of the people would be same but not all people are equal and same, na mehram bhi islamic circle kay andar hotay hoe pyar karsaktay hain or unka pyar misali hosakta hai sab na mehramo ki mohabbat buri nahe hosakti but unpe lable lag jata hai na mehram ka,unka gunah unki na mehram love hi hota hsucha pyaar to nahe.
but gunah to married couple bhi kartay hain husband wife ek dosre k hokook na poray kar kay,so i think everybod is genehgaar in their space and i believe that Allah miyan buhut rehemdil aur maaf farmanay walay hain bas uskay insaan ki niyat thek honi chahiyai,ajkal k doar main koi paarsa nahe ban sakta sab insan apne wakt main kuch na kuch karchukay hotay hain but karnay k baad jab unka wakt khatam hojata hai to wo us he baat pe tankeed karnay lagtay hain jo kabhi wo khud kia kartey thay, so that's the rule of our society thinking.
Miss maryam.mai nahe samajhta kay Allah miyan apni mohabbat dil se nikaal detay hain if somebody involve in true love , true love k ilawa kuch or kia jaega love mai jesey flirt , time paas ,lust, multiple love, crus, likeness and vice versa then i think obviously when insan ki niyat he thek nahe love karnay main to Allah ka pyar kese aeega usmai. so again its depend on person to person, person ki niyat thek hai to mera nahe khayal Allah uske saath na hoga. Miss sunehri,your last reply is excellent.
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myrizvi
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Group: Members Joined: 20th Apr, 2008 Topic: 130 Post: 7739 Age:
55
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| Posted on:12th Sep 2010, 2:59am |
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Mohabbat hona aur Mohabbat karna aam taur say log, bilkhasoos aisay log jo kissi k love maiN "giratfaar" houN iss baat main "tafreeq" nahi karsaktay /kartay k mohabbat hona aur mohabbat "karna" 2 alag alag shaii hai aur inkay darmayaan baal barabar faraq hai... just like mumlekat (state) aur hakoomat (government) (log amooman inhaiN same samajhtay haiN)
chouNkay islam k elawah deger mazahab /culture maiN iss say koi khaas faraq nahi paRta k ap ko kissi say mohabbat hogayee hai yaa ap kissi say mohabbat "kar" rahay hain.... both soortouN maiN lover n beloved ka amal aur radday amal same hota hai.
islam main chouNkay "mahmaram aur naa.mahram" aik aham chapter hai aur naa.mahram afraad k mabain dealing ka poora code of conduct maujood hai lehaza do naa.mahram afraad k darmayaan ki jaanay wali yaa hojaanay wali "mohabbat" k "after effects" baRi ahmiat k haamil haiN.
islamic rulings oss waqt bhi same hi rahti hai jab 2 naa.mahram afraad k maabain "mohabbat ka rishtah istawar ho jaa.ay"....... go islam mohabbat k jazbay ko tasleem karta hai magar woh aisay jorouN say taqazah karta hai k woh apnay dilouN maiN qaim hojanay wali mohabbat k "physical izhaar" say qabal yaa to nikaah k bandhan main bandh jayaiN... aur agar aisaa mumkin nah ho to aik doosray say aisaa koi raabitah nah rakhaiN, jiss say kissi bhi islamic qawaneen ki khilaaf warzi hoti ho...
ISLAMIC MOHABBATKA CODE OF CONDUCT:
1. agar apko kissi say mohabbat hogayee hai yaa ap kissi say mohabbat karna chaahtay haiN aur woh apko acha lagta /lagti hai to sab say pahlay yeh "study" karaiN k kia ap ossay apna spouse banaanay k liyeh tayyar haiN... aur kia iss baat k imkaanaat haiN k ap oss say nikaah kar sakaiN
2. agar apki study ka jawab NO maiN ataa hai to iss mohabbat k izhaar say guraiz karaiN... nah to ossay batlayain k mujhay tum say mohabbat hogayee hai, nah oskay saath gup shup karain aur nah hi kissi bhi bahanay say qurbat k lamhaat talaash karain aur agar woh pahlay say apkay "contacts" (like rishtah daar, paRosi, class mate, rafeeqay kaar etc etc) main ho to ap yaa to oss say "qabl az mohabbat" wali dealing hi rakhaiN (jo aksar mumkin nahi hoti) yaa phir iss earlier dealing maiN mazeed faaslay paidaa karlaiN
3. agar jawaab YES maiN aataa ho to pahlay oss fard ko apnay jazbaat indirectly send karaiN agar response negative aa.ay tab bhi above step-2 par amal karaiN k yeh fareeqay saani (2nd person) ka basic insaani right hai k woh apkay "luv proposal ko accept yaa reject karay)
4. agar jawaab YES maiN aa.ay aur fareeqay saani bhi razamand dikhayee day...... to ab iss luv ko nikaah main convert karnay k mission ka aghaaz karaiN.apnay parents ko batlayaiN...oskay parents tak apnay jazbaat pahonchayaiN... rishtah bhejaiN etc etc till k apki onsay shadi hoja.ay.... BUT...
5. step-4 tak aa janay ka yeh matlab nahi k ap "rewayti love affairs wali harkataiN" start kar daiN... dounouN lovers lambiiiiiiiiiii guftagoooo shooroo kardaiN..........sms /emails /voice mails k zariyah romaanvi mokaalmaat ko baRhawa daiN.... aik doosray say molaaqaat start karaiN.... outing karain, dating karaiN, aik doosray say tanhaayee maiN molaaqaat /baat karaiN k aik hadees k motaabiq jab 2 naa.mahram afraad baaham miltay hain to onmaiN teesra shaitaan hota hai........ aur shaitaan batadreej dounouN ko shaitaani harkaat ki taraf lay jata hai...yeh sab amaal start hi say islam allow nahi kartaa.......... |
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